March 31, 2010

Cheaper than Mayor Bloomberg's program

There is much discussion these days about expensive programs to ameliorate social problems. One plan that has been overlooked is to bribe fortunetellers.

From the LA Times:
Whether migrants should stay or leave California is a question that reaches even the palm and card reader at the El Indio Amazonico botanical shop on Alvarado Street.

Patrons usually come in with common questions about love or money. But since the economy wobbled, they also come to ask whether their future is elsewhere -- perhaps far from California.

"A lot of people ask, 'Should I go back to my country, to Mexico or Guatemala or El Salvador,'" said Juliana Contreras, 45. "People ask, 'Should I go or should I leave?' I usually tell them if it's bad here, it's worse in their countries."

Still, the streets teem less than before. Is that because fewer people are going out and spending money, or because immigrants have left?

It seems to me that slipping palm-readers a few twenties to tell unemployed illegal immigrants on the verge of leaving the country that, yes, they should go home, their moms miss them, would return more bang for the buck than any other social program imaginable.

Really, when out-of-work illegal immigrants are already asking "Should I go or should I leave?" how hard would it be to persuade them to go and/or leave?

The Obama Administration has been desperate to get unemployed illegal immigrants to stay in the U.S. through Census Day, April 1st to pump up the quotas by making them fear they'll miss the Coming Amnesty if they bail out now. But, come April 2nd, can we finally let the poor bastards go home?

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is simultaneously the single best idea you have ever had and also the reason why you will never publish another piece at National Review for the remainder of your natural life.

God it would be neat if you could get David Frum's vacated seat at AEI, though - even if only in an alternate universe...

Anonymous said...

Your racial paranoia makes you write funny blogposts. I lol'd at this one.

Baloo said...

An alternate universe like that... Well, I'll bet it's true in THIS ONE.

Lugash said...

I am Lugash.

Steve,

What is your opinion the HCR monstrosity? You've been relatively quiet on health care.

I think we're going to get foreseeable unintended consequence concerning the usual suspects with regards to mandatory insurance. The people who can't manage going to the doctor without being bribed aren't going to hustle down to BCBS and pick up a personal policy once the law passes. Yet more "disparate impact" in the making? Probably redlining and predatory underwriting as well.

I am Lugash.

Anonymous said...

This post put you over the top Steve. You are now the King, Commander, Master, Jefe, of the entire internet. I went to a fortune teller on a lark and got married to my now and then girlriend after a "sayer" urged me on.....2 years and a lot of acrimony later I learned that maybe that woman who just met me 2 minutes before shouldn't have decided my future. Well, live and learn.

Dan in DC

Hery said...

good, i like it

Anonymous said...

I don't believe the Obama administration is really that hot on keeping illegal immigrants here.

I'm a criminal defense attorney and I know that in the past two years if an immigrant gets picked up for anything they get reported to immigration. In fact, this year, they've been doing it for really small infractions. I'm not sure who really controls the reporting policy, whether its the local county or the feds. But, I live in a very immigrant friendly county and they're reporting like crazy.

I expect the Immigration Reform that'll come next year to be very enforcement heavy.

Anonymous said...

I expect the Immigration Reform that'll come next year to be very enforcement heavy.


Since the GOP will be running Congress next year, the odds of that are much better than at present.

Paul Mendez said...

If the GOP gains influence in Congress, you can bet that any immigration "reform" will NOT be enforcement heavy when it comes to the real villains -- the businesses that hire illegal aliens. They're the ones that will get the real amnesty!

Anonymous said...

It's like the Dems are at all interested in going after the businesses which hire illegals. They're bigger corporate whores than the Pubbies.

David said...

Republican$ love immigration. Not the rank-and-file Republican$. The Republican$ in government.

David Davenport said...

Steve, check this comment:

Paul Zrimsek said...

Whites are forbidden to answer with their racism.

Not that that ever stops Steve Sailer and his pathetic acolytes. We've got to start doing a better job of forbidding.


3/31/10 11:26 AM


Under the blog entry:

"But if the old bowing and boyish president is receding, a new and more ominous president is emerging."

Shelby Steele examines the new Barack Obama, after the health care fight:...


at Ann Althouse's blog

https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=6329595&postID=1466712016381900627

Anonymous said...

I used to be a professional fortune teller. Of course in those days we called it making multiple regression mathematical models.

Kylie said...

What a great idea.

And how about revivals of The Wizard of Oz, dubbed in Spanish, played in movie houses along our Southern border?

I bet this would really resonate with homesick illegal immigrants:

"Tin Woodsman: What have you learned, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Well, I - I think that it - it wasn't enough to just want to see Tío Enrique and Tía Emilia - and it's that - if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is that right?...Home! And I'm not gonna leave here ever, ever again, because I love you all, and - oh, Tía Emilia - there's no place like home!"

By the same token, movies like West Side Story that feature subversive messages like this are to be avoided:

"The Girls: [singing] I like to be in America, OK by me in America, everything free in America.."

neil craig said...

I suspect the main effect would be to discredit fortune tellers once the news got out & maybe get a few lynched.

Perhaps a similar programme could be instituted with lawyers.

Anonymous said...

Superstition is widespread throughout Latin America. The fortune teller bribe thing might just work!

Peter A said...

I don't believe the Obama administration is really that hot on keeping illegal immigrants here.

Maybe Obama really IS a black nationalist. With regards to immigration, we can only hope...

Anonymous said...

You write for two backwater publications: Taki, and Vdare.

Eric said...

If people are going to palm readers with the question "should I go home?", they've already decided to leave. They just need someone to validate the decision.

Dennis Dale said...

"People ask, 'Should I go or should I leave?' I usually tell them if it's bad here, it's worse in their countries."

With this she tells the truth.
But then what's she gonna do, send her clientele out of the country? Of course this is her answer--and how gullible are these people who ask? Okay, stupid question; they patronize palm-readers!

Publius said...

You know, you could bribe the fortune tellers on your own. There's no need for a government project.

Whiskey said...

Have you listened to Adam Carolla lately? Guy has been on a tear about illegal aliens, bureaucracy, making Steve's point about how it is students and parents, not teachers that are the problem. His hatred for Tony Villaraigosa is amusing.

Check out his podcasts at AdamCarolla.com .

The guy is socially liberal, works in Hollywood, and even he is getting fed up. His point is that racism is over-used, to the point where it is meaningless. He calls out Maxine Waters and Waxman specifically along with Villaraigosa as "retards."

It seems like shame/guilt only have so long a lifespan. Then they just cease to be effective as a means of social control.

Prediction: Steve will write soon for the Weekly Standard.

l said...

"It seems like shame/guilt only have so long a lifespan. Then they just cease to be effective as a means of social control."

When guilt/shame quit working, send Homeland Security and the FBI.

Curvaceous Carbon-based Life Form said...

"You know, you could bribe the fortune tellers on your own. There's no need for a government project."

Yeah, let's get Steve to start a fund. THAT's a cause I'd send money to. Can we get 501(c)3 tax exempt status? (heh)

Anonymous said...

You know, you could bribe the fortune tellers on your own.

Agreed, although further commentary along those lines [particularly anything that sounds even vaguely conspiratorial or organizational in nature] is highly unlikely to make it past Komment Kontrol.

John Seiler said...

The fortune tellers would just take the money, go to college, and become economists.

JudgeStone said...

Speaking of cheap ideas. Why don't we just pay students to go to school?

You find a reasonable goal for each student, offer $200 at the end of each MP if he meets those goals, and save about $5,000 per student per year on the student motivation industry.

All we do now is make empty promises that if students jump through all the right hoops they'll get a good job with a bunch of money on their 22nd birthday, which is a lie.

Anonymous said...

@ Whiskey

Re: Maxine Waters & other members of the Congressional Black Caucus

Many of their districts have undergone a demographic shift from majority Black to majority/heavily Hispanic. According to wiki, it's 34% Black, 47% Hispanic.
This is why she and others are pro illegal immigrant.

Nevermind that poor Hispanic illegal and legal immigrants are causing the most economic harm to Blacks...

Judgestone said...

So, in the spirit of cheap solutions, can I propose we offer about $200 per student per MP to meet achievable-though-difficult goals for them and save about $6,000 per year on the childcare industry masquarading as the education industry.

Camlost said...

Speaking of cheap ideas. Why don't we just pay students to go to school?

Believe it or not the black leadership in Atlanta is way ahead of you on this.

tommy said...

OT.

Adam Carolla on illegal immigrants in LA, street vendors and their garbage, and the priorities of cops, politicians.

Listen from 6:00 onward to the podcast entitled "Adam and You." Funny and sad all at once.

The Carolla Doctrine on Illegal Immigration:

The more shit that's sold on the street, the worse the nation.

kritisk_borger said...

If it was discovered that the Government were bribing fortune tellers to persuade illegals to return home to their native countries, could these illegals then sue the Government for the physiological stress suffered by being duped by these fortune tellers?

Anonymous said...

On another topic, Steve, do you know why, or can anyone else tell me, why is Tiger Woods not under indictment?

It seems to me that he could easily be indicted for, at a minimum, solicitation of prostitution, and also for bribing Rachel Uchitel.

Understanding indictment is not the same as conviction, it seems an easy case can be made for indicting Tiger Woods for both solicitation of prostitution and bribing Rachel Uchitel to keep her mouth shut.

A D.A. can indict a ham sandwhich, so indictiing Woods should be nothing. It would be fascinating to see the disgusting Michael Jordan, and equaly disgusting Charles Barkley, pulled in as well.

Any answers?

Anonymous said...

Re:Tiger,

At a minimum, a D.A. should look into Wood's association wth a known professional gambler and quasi-organized crime figure-Michael Jordan.

What's that you say? M.J. a gambler? A mob associate? Why, the next thing your going to tell me is Warren Moon cheats on his wife!

Yes, my poor, backwards hat-wearing, overweight, goateed, and baggy jean adorned halfwitted friend, it is true. Try not to get your information from complete morons like Tony Kornheiser and the idiot Mike in the Morning who is not Mike Golic.

Jordan is an extremely bad character. It speaks volumes of Fred Couples lack of intelligence (which is well-known on Tour) that he made Jordan a co-captain on the Presidents Cup team.

So yes, Tiger should be investigated are probably indicted.

silly girl said...

David Dale,

OMG, that picture of Rasputin looks just like David Axelrod with a beard!!!

Anonymous said...

Awesome - just opened up shop as a palm reader! Now all I need is some Spanish lessons and some of that artificial tanning cream, and I'm set. I'm filing as a 501c(3).

Anonymous said...

Believe it or not the black leadership in Atlanta is way ahead of you on this.

It almost goes without saying that the picture used in that Atlanta link appears to show mostly (all?) white students.